here’s a bit of a nonsense of a post for you. I thought, and correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems like in Bulgaria currently there is a certain amount of people (too much) who really enjoy listening to a certain Bulgarian politician, who recently won the award for best football player of 2011. and since he’s a complete moron and won’t talking nonsense 24/7, I thought – why not? maybe this is the way to attract attention, gain new followers and make people like me. so, here I go…
first, I would like to thank God for the cool sunny weather we had in Glasgow today. I think the weather-people should go to church this Sunday and personally light a candle. weather miracles happen, you know? even in Glasgow.
second, today I got chased by a gang of crazy mother fucking ninjas down Crow Road. they were throwing bowls of spaghetti bolognese and melon ice cream at me while a group of German tourists were taking photos of the helicopters that fly over Partick. I managed to escape from the ninjas but when I had a look around, I realised I had no idea where I am but there was that sheep that was staring at me and making me feel really uncomfortable. I needed to find my back to Sainsbury’s before 4pm because I had to take the lift to my flat and let Tom Smith go before my flatmate was back. however, I totally forgot the subway was closed today because of the strike of the mice against the noise levels in the tunnels, so I had to take the bus to High Street and then transfer on the ferry service on the Clyde, stop at the new transport museum, and ask a flock of pigeons to carry me back to Rosevale Street.
and you know what? it nearly worked if it wasn’t for the desert storm that went straight through the pigeons so they dropped me on the street. luckily, I fell on top of the Rosevale tavern so just ran across the roofs until I reached my block. and you know what else? I actually made it.
fucking pigeons.
i personally believe you every single word.